House-hunting post #whatever

"Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck) 01/22/2018 at 22:55 • Filed to: house-hunting

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My, my wife, and our agent, at a vacant home today:

[dramatization, gist is accurate]

Mrs. Z: We should make an offer!

Me: I don’t know... did you see that minor imperfection no one else would notice in that one room with the stuff and things? Makes me worry!

Agent: Look at this view!

Me: Yes, it is quite nice... But this house is fucking expensive.

Mrs. Z: We could make an offer that we’re willing to pay, what do we have to lose?

Me: Well there’s no way this will go for that amount, right?

Agent: VEEEEYOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Me: ... Are you okay?

Agent: Oh sorry. Hell no, it won’t. You’ll probably need to do an escalation clause if you really wanted it.

Me: What are the odds we’ll land it?

Agent: Well... [counts business cards left in kitchen]... So twenty potential buyers have been here in just two days. For this home at this price with the low inventory, probably 25% of them will put in an offer.

Me: ... It’s gonna be like this every home, isn’t it?

Agent: Yep.

Me:

CB > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/22/2018 at 23:03

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My condolences. Best of luck.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > CB 01/22/2018 at 23:04

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I’m sorry if I sound all FWP here... I was going for mild HEW-MOR

Tekamul > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/22/2018 at 23:05

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Does it even HAVE a chandelier?

Or was that the view they were talking about...

Discerning > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/22/2018 at 23:05

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Been there. In this city people are putting in cash offers just to entice sellers. It’s been a seller’smarket for a while now :\

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Tekamul 01/22/2018 at 23:06

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Oh, the view is pretty sick.

But it did have ONE chandelier! If I don’t get slaughtered in the bidding, I will share!

LOREM IPSUM > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/22/2018 at 23:07

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Iowa is just next door, right? That’s gotta be a more economical state to purchase in... probably cheaper on taxes too.

With all of the potatoes I imagine are just lying around there, I bet you could homebrew some e85. Combine that with supreme Japanese mpgs and you could commute to WA daily and still come out ahead financially. Or, better yet, just relocate to Iowa altogether! That’s the real American Dream... Ain’t it?

interstate366, now In The Industry > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/22/2018 at 23:08

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You need to consider the most important opinion here: doggo.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > interstate366, now In The Industry 01/22/2018 at 23:09

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House would be bigger for doggo and is near park doggo likes also doggo is doggo.

RiceRocketeer Extraordinaire > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/22/2018 at 23:14

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I would chew my arm off before house hunting and buying again.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > RiceRocketeer Extraordinaire 01/22/2018 at 23:14

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That’s what I’ve been saying for years. Until I stopped saying that and started house-hunting again.

AestheticsInMotion > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/22/2018 at 23:16

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Come live in Kirkland. Here’s a nice studio for just a bit over a million. HOA dues aren’t even $1000 a month! And the doggy deductible is a paltry $5000! Come on, think of the shenanigans we could get up to!

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > AestheticsInMotion 01/22/2018 at 23:20

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I was just in Kirkland today, right off of Ne 72nd St by the freeway. They shoehorned a few homes in an existing neighborhood (they’re basically detached townhomes), all “starting in the low $1,000,000's! I think they’re 4 beds, 2.5 baths, view of identical boxes on all sides.

Tristan > LOREM IPSUM 01/22/2018 at 23:21

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Iowa is 1,700 miles from Washington. Idaho, on the other hand...

AestheticsInMotion > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/22/2018 at 23:25

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Yuck. Also, It bothers me greatly seeing “low” and “$1,000,000's” next to each other. Even the new cul-de-sacs in an ugly part of Woodinville are “luxury homes starting from the low $1,000,000's” now.

I hear parts of Oregon are pretty nice

TheTurbochargedSquirrel > AestheticsInMotion 01/22/2018 at 23:30

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$1.25M and you don’t even get a bedroom?

LOREM IPSUM > Tristan 01/22/2018 at 23:37

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Damnit. Haha

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/22/2018 at 23:38

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Why are you house hunting again?! It’s not worth it unless the new place is like 10 miles closer to work or better. Seriously, mortgage interest is all front loaded and the market is psycho.

Mind you, we landed our place for below asking after a really intense back-and-forth with the owner through the agents, including some mysterious last second offer (which I’m pretty sure was fake, damned RE agents). I stuck to my guns and wouldn’t budge, so the other offer must’ve been terrible or fake.

I really didn’t want to be out so far, but it was in our budget and you had to be this far out to not be in the middle of bidding wars... In our old neighborhood the houses were going for hundreds of thousands above asking (2 across the street and one next door sold in the last year we were there, each time with the madness RPM & I described at dinner)...

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > LOREM IPSUM 01/22/2018 at 23:41

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You don’t even need to go to Idaho. Just get yourself east of the Cascades and housing becomes extremely cheap.

LOREM IPSUM > Tristan 01/22/2018 at 23:43

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Two potatoes are standing on a street corner. How do you know which one is the hooker?

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.

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The one with the sticker that says Idaho.

RangerSmith > LOREM IPSUM 01/22/2018 at 23:44

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Weird Fact. Washington yields more tons of potatoes per year than Idaho. Second only to California.

Edit: Apparently I should have checked more recent information. California WAS number one a couple of years ago. Washington is still number two. Idaho is again number one. Weird.

http://www.nationalpotatocouncil.org/potato-facts/

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/22/2018 at 23:45

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Just get a second on your existing home and build a bigly garage.

Chariotoflove > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/22/2018 at 23:48

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This is why I am never moving.

fintail > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/22/2018 at 23:56

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Under-pricing to create a bidding war is a big trick these days.

Neil drives a beetle and a fancy beetle > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/22/2018 at 23:56

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This realization came to me today too. We looked at a house yesterday for the second time. We put in an offer, and almost immediately, the sellers agent notifies our agent that 3 people wanted to be warned if an offer went in and all three put in their best offers and we upped ours. Our agent thought it was over priced but we did asking price and seller cover most of closing... and didn’t get it.

It was pretty and cool but the garage sucked, so maybe it’s for the better. Good luck, you never know.

Spaceball-Two > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/22/2018 at 23:57

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I’ll help you move.

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > AestheticsInMotion 01/22/2018 at 23:58

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Basically the same place with less traffic and cheaper housing.

Tristan > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/23/2018 at 00:11

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Mrs. T: I LOVE THIS HOUSE! It’s perfect, in a walkable community, it’s all updated, we can actually afford the taxes, and it’s in an amazing school district!

Me: The garage is kinda smallish... and where will I park my car trailer?

Tristan > AMGtech - now with more recalls! 01/23/2018 at 00:12

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Not if everyone from CA and WA keep moving here...

Tristan > AestheticsInMotion 01/23/2018 at 00:13

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Come on down. We need more non-vaping, non-dudebro car guys.

AestheticsInMotion > Tristan 01/23/2018 at 00:25

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Assuming I make the transfer into my next career somewhat smoothly, it could very well happen. I’m up for a change of pace. Also, natural hot springs.

AestheticsInMotion > AMGtech - now with more recalls! 01/23/2018 at 00:27

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I like all parts of that sentence.

promoted by the color red > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/23/2018 at 00:40

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Sell everything and move to the desert. You can have your pick of homes for $250k. Nobody asks why you have 10 cars and a dune buggy parked on your lawn either, they just accept it.

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > AestheticsInMotion 01/23/2018 at 00:58

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We have lots of those

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Spaceball-Two 01/23/2018 at 01:05

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If we ever land a house, you’ll rue the day you offered me help!

Dogsatemypants > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/23/2018 at 01:27

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So many houses are just sitting vacant “appreciating” in our area. If we could muzzle speculative real estate investors there mught be a chance for the market to balance out. The other half of it is that the market can bear the ridiculous prices due to major wage disparity.

Dogsatemypants > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/23/2018 at 01:28

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Go for goldbar, super cheap land and houses if you are willing to take a risk at auction.

random001 > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/23/2018 at 06:46

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You can’t move, all those pictures I use to track your movements will be useless!

I mean...ummm....

OPPOsaurus WRX > AestheticsInMotion 01/23/2018 at 08:08

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HOA LOL WTF

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > promoted by the color red 01/23/2018 at 08:59

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TOO HOT

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > fintail 01/23/2018 at 09:00

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And it works. My buddy offered 25 grand more than asking price on another home. He was outbid by an additional 20 grand... And they paid in cash!

fintail > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/23/2018 at 10:08

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Yup. I have a co-worker (or his new wife, really), who fell in love with a little old house in Columbia City - which is “up and coming” to be nice. Price seemed low, he put in a bid for something like 20K over, and it sold for 100K over, which means someone paid three quarters of a million dollars for a house in not the best area. Love this place.

merged-5876237249235911857-hrw8uc > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/23/2018 at 11:14

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That’s painful, and cash offers are tough to beat as it is. Tough market.

Future next gen S2000 owner > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/23/2018 at 15:05

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I love and hate the market appreciation in my are right now. I paid 7K over asking when I bought my house. There were 6 offers made on the first day and we were under contract the next business day. House went live on a Friday, we were under contract on a Monday.

I’d like to move closer to work, the difference in house prices makes my wallet clamp shut. I can’t get anything decent that isn’t 40+ years old for under 375K.

I’m not moving into a pristine example of 1980's for that. New builds are a minimum of 450K.

I’ll keep my cheap ass mortgage.